Karate is hard

But honestly, I think it’s VERY good for kids.

Wow, I thought that everyone was doing well online and following directions because they weren’t complaining as much and didn’t seem lost, but omg, when they came to the gym in person, holy shit, they were CLUELESS.

Some of the super young kids couldn’t tell the difference between left and right—couldn’t even COPY ME!!!! Like I thought that was the easiest thing to do as a kid. Nope. Although Motor Learning research says otherwise, I guess for some (special needs) kids, they need to have me literally and physically move their limbs over and over again for them to learn something. Very strange how they defy all odds.

BUT, they definitely do well and improve upon more practice of a particular technique–I was honestly very impressed to see how well they took simple number instruction and just went along with it. I also started to feel like my ‘old confident grounded self’ when teaching and doing all those gruesome deep knee bends again. I definitely enjoy getting paid teaching martial arts all day, rather than dumbass team sports lol.

Doing karate often makes me compare a lot of my years doing naginata to karate. Perhaps karate’s philosophy has actually called the future/made predictions way before naginata? Did I not get to that same level in naginata in the mental side/seeing the big picture because that kind of mature philosophy perhaps didn’t sink in on time? Or was the lack of the competitive exposure, which I lacked in karate, was what I needed to become a more well-rounded and balanced martial artist?

It makes me want to explore some of the older philosophies of karate–perhaps there are some clues there which I haven’t been exposed to yet in naginata. I think there were many things about karate that I didn’t understand as a kid, but maybe it’ll come to fruition now?…

I guess a part of me is like “bah, too bad I wasn’t into karate when I was during my peak athletic years xD hahahahaaha” nah, I think things happened in the right time in the right places. I definitely could learn from my past though, to make my future stronger.

Karate Unit

So I started off the year by teaching a karate unit. I honestly was such an idiot for not doing this before—I mean it only makes LOGICAL SENSE to teach something that I’ve done for 12 years, and although rusty, I am much more familiar with compared to the typical heteronormative white male-dominated realm of team sports. I didddd need a refresher from one of my old Sensei, which he thankfully was gracious enough to provide me with, and it’s strange, my whole body just moved on its own without me thinking. It’s like I just needed those standard cues and orders that were done at the dojo to be said to me again, in order for me to go do it.

But omg within one day, I REMEMBERED what I hated about it—I HATED deep knee bends with a flaming passion–omg my legs were so dead. Wtf, why do I even bother going to the gym and doing boring fitness exercises when I can get the same effects via. karate in the first place? xD

The kids seem to like it so far, I don’t know if it’s just the energy I give off, or if it’s just that they’ve always wanted to do it and they think it’s cool.

Also deep down, I’m secretly grinning at the success of this. I just really wish that my terrible cooperating teachers could’ve seen me do this so that they can get ‘educated’ in how valuable martial arts is, and how a team sports-dominated curriculum is not the best way to teach phys ed. I also just would love to say to their face, “Well you should research it! If you have the time to do other things, you can research it” xD Hah, such ignorant fucks. It may be easy for someone who’s familiar with the games due to being an athlete with thousands of hours in that particular team sport, but not for someone who doesn’t have that same level of experience, so it’s unfair for anyone to place those same expectations on people when they have disclosed beforehand that they don’t have the same experience as you.

I mean wtf, how much more insulting can you get? I thought you’re supposed to be a teacher, so you’re supposed to be teaching, not belittling your pupils. I just hope that you are going through the torture of the realization of the need for individual sports and why they are important.

My body also feels better and more nimble because of it. Would I go back to karate? Probably not, mainly due to the concern of the footwork fucking mine up in naginata. It took me forever to get better at naginata footwork, yet I’m still working on it.

However do I prefer karate as a form of exercise and fitness over yoga and gym fitness classes? Oh yeah, definitely.

Wow, and that was an entire year

Wow, time really does feel slow when you don’t have anything else going on in your life due to the pandemic. It was easy to waste time and find excuses to waste time, just because you cannot get into your usual routine. It gets harder and harder to fight it off as well.

I have never taken this much of a break from budo/exercise. Like I’ve said before, the pandemic and this forced break makes me live in the “idea” of naginata, rather than DOING naginata. I miss going outside to my cafes and being able run around in my athleisure attire while doing so.

I wasn’t able to do alot of my new year’s resolutions from last year, so a lot of those 2020 resolutions have now been passed on to the 2021 year. The 2020 year though, admittedly, made me start to explore new projects that I’m definitely going to include in my 2021 goals. Maybe next year I’ll live that “Instagrammy influencer lifestyle” and have it documented more like the old days.

I don’t think it’s healthy for majority of people to rely on 2021 to just magically be 1000% better. I honestly don’t see things getting better overnight, I think it’ll take a little while.

I’m also going to just organize more and sell plants and clothes that I’m a bit tired of and just grew out of.

The biggest resolution I have for next year is to reclaim my old fearless self that was taken away from me due to abuse and betrayal. I know I”m still there and I learned and grew from my traumatic experiences, but I definitely am looking forward for the clock to strike midnight so that I can just be on top of alot of my life again.

See you soon 2021! Life is still too short!